We went to Bed on 17 October 2010. We’ve gone to bed many times in our lives (me vastly more times than Marek, of course), but we’ve never been to the Bed Restaurant at 11582 N Williams St in Dunnellon. The morning actually started with Marek arguing that he wanted to wear his pajamas all day and me fighting him out of them. If I’d known what we were getting into, I’d have let him wear Buzz Lightyear all day.

When we sat down they promptly handed us some little muffins. I’m always a fan of any place that hands me muffins when I walk in. Restaurants. Funeral homes. Flower shops. Bait and tackle shops. There’s no place that’s so good that it can’t be made better by being handed muffins. Except maybe a muffin shop. That’d just be too much muffin.

Marek agrees. My main man knows his muffins.

Today’s a special day for several reasons. These may be the same reasons that your days are special, too, dear reader. First, we woke up to this lovely, enormous, wicked brown widow in the bathtub. (Sorry for the lousy photograph! My mobile camera doesn’t do things like f-stops and manual focal lengths. It also never rings with a call from President Obama, which just compounds my disappointment in this phone.)

The other thing that makes today special is this hat. If you’re wondering if I’m singing while wearing it, the answer is, yes. Yes, I am.

Marek has the exact same hat, a fact that will surely astonish even the most jaded of our readers. I call this his lucky red hat, though in all honesty, his luck appears to be about the same whether he wears it or not.

Inside Bed you find not only groovy guys with lucky red hats (sombreros rojos con suertes beuños for our Spanish-speaking readers), but you’ll notice that the booths are decorated as four-poster beds. And, in what makes Bed really nifty, the staff all wear pajamas! So you get this sort of weird little voyeuristic titillation. This is the exact same feeling that Manet invoked in people when he unveiled Le dĂ©jeuner sur l’herbe.

Coffee? A perfect refreshment while enjoying this live-action Manet tableau. This is our kind of coffee. You can stand up a fork in it. Also, this is the first breakfast we have visited where coffee came with saucers. Who can argue with saucers?! Not pictured here, for some reason, is Marek’s saucer. I’ve now said “saucer” three, no, four times, which is about four times more than I usually do in any given month. Breakfast in Bed pushes the envelop like that.

As you might imagine, Ivo tapped me on the shoulder and said, “Oh father, the hunger ravages me so. By which I mean my empty belly, not the 1980s movie with David Bowie and Catherine Deneuve, which also ravages, but not in the same way.” I was quite surprised, as I didn’t ever peg Ivo for an 80s cult flick kind of guy, but I fed him anyway.

This is Chuck and Boomer. You probably already knew that.

We had breakfast! Delivered in Bed! By a pretty girl in her pajamas! We wore a lucky red hat! What more do you want in a breakfast, hmm?

This is my artful rendition of bacon. I’m inspired by Manet this morning. And also Chuck Close.

The eggs were nicely done also. We haven’t been getting eggs lately, but we were hongree, which is how we say “hungry” when we’re really hungry. Also shown here: saucers.

Marek and I split some pancakes. So here’s the funny thing. These were good pancakes. Very tasty, served in bed, it’s all good. But they had an interesting consistency, almost like injera.

The bill rolled in at about 12 clams. Not bad for all this good chow!

Marek took on the task. He’s got mad skillz!

He got a little lost and trespassed. The Bed Military Police had to escort him out of the defensive perimeter.

We had a great time in Bed. Good chow, great folks, and a cool theme idea. We’re pleased to give Bed a Tampa Bay Breakfasts four and a half pancake rating.


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2 thoughts on “Bed

  1. Darren Doran

    Thank you so much for visiting our family restaurant , I understand Marek was the perfect gentleman, We would love having your entire family back for another visit real soon. Again glad you enjoyed your breakfast!
    The Doran Family


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