We visited Lenny’s at 21220 Us Highway 19 N in Clearwater on 6 March 2010. Lenny’s was recommended to us by our old friend and Tampa Bay Breakfast alum, Jeff. This was our first visit.

Lenny’s is clearly a Baseball Place. A Phillies place. I was in Little League in the early 80s. That’s the extent of my baseball knowledge. Oh, also, I do know that “ball” in Spanish is “pelota.”

So we’re not reaaaallllly baseball kids, Marek and I. But we ARE hometown kids. Which means that given the choice we love the Rays, the Bucs, and the Bolts. And we pay jusssttt enough attention to baseball to know that last year the Phillies were really rude to Rays fans during the World Series. We’re keeping an open mind, but first we’re going to try out these awesome bleacher seats.

Marek says, “come ON, Homer, less cornball more pancake!”

Inside is crowded. That’s a good sign. We can’t imagine this many people showing up for pukecakes and ickybacon. Everyone’s very friendly and welcoming. We get a booth right away. See the baseball bats on the ceiling?

Immediately we realize that we’ve sat in the dangerous Dune Buggy Zone. Watch Out! Dune Buggies! Run!

Marek gets it under control right away. Then he starts just whipping these cars around at Maximum Dune Buggy Speed, which is not exactly NASCAR speed, but it’s still way too fast for the breakfast track.

Lucky for all the innocent bystanders, the cops showed up. German cops, in fact.

All this, and we haven’t even looked at the menu. What a day, and it’s only 0830. Check out the Redneck Benedict. Now think about this from a breakfast science point of view. Can you REALLY go wrong in a place that has “Redneck Benedict” on the menu?

Really, now, can you?

Well. Probably.

But when you flip the page and find all these fine breakfasts named after lovely ladies from decades past, you realize then that this is a Good Place. Any breakfast joint that loves breakfast enough to name it “Lorraine” is OK by us.

Right away they brought us the “complimentary Danish basket.” Now I tell you, this almost threw off our mojo. We came here to sample the pancakes, but we could have just fell into this basket, had a cuppa Joe and left full. These were good Danishes! Marek pulled a snatchy-grabby on one before the basket hit the table.

And the good news kept rolling in. Here comes coffee!

Boldly Black. This is good, standard diner swill. Just the way we like it. And it didn’t stay empty long, which is also the way we like it.

We start talking sports and breakfast. You know, the kinds of things all fathers and sons discuss. Marek says, hey old man, if you took the Rays and the Phillies and gave them all dune buggies and told them to race from here to Thonotosassa, who do you think would win? I answered calmly, with the gravitas that comes with age and experience. Clearly, the Tampa buggy team would win. While Philly folk may beat us on being rude, the concept of Road Rage was invented in Tampa. We agreed. Cheers!

Since we were having a Serious Baseball Discussion in what is obviously a Serious Baseball Place, we tried to play the part by getting in each other’s faces about abstract statistics of players who died in 1926. If only we had beer to throw at each other!

Lucky for me, breakfast came. Marek was starting to get a little upset that I thought the ‘74 Oakland A’s would have made lousy dune buggy racers. Notice the bacon heist in progress. Where’s the Polizei when you need them?!

As you may have figured out by now, dear reader, Marek is not adverse to a little bacon with his pancakes. What is not obvious here is that I also am not adverse to a little bacon with my pancakes. But I seem to have lost all the bacon when I was busy fiddling with taking a picture. That, loyal TBB fans, is the price that I pay for you every weekend. We at Tampa Bay Breakfasts are about service and sacrifice.

Marek gave that bacon the Houdini treatment and jumped into some pancakes.

Can you tell by looking at these pictures that the pancakes need something? What do you think it is? Butter? Syrup? Fruit? Chocolate chips?

If you thought any of those, you’d be just wrong. Clearly, preposterously wrong. These pancakes need pepper.

What? Don’t look at ME. It wasn’t MY idea. I’m not going to eat that.

But sure enough, Marek digs right in. I think he gets that from his mother’s side.

The bacon, what I was able to smell, anyway, was really good. Not Steve-crisp, but still pretty good. The eggs were a little runnier than I really love, but they were still very tasty. The pancakes were yummy but kind of small. This stack makes up for a lack of girth by being tall, but still they’re sort of smallish. Dune buggy added to show scale.

When we were done with breakfast, we took some quality time to goof off. Or perhaps I could be whispering in his ear to behave or I’ll spank you back to last Tuesday. Or maybe just a little bit of both.

And I might be wrong here, but I’m pretty sure that I am the only person to ever review a breakfast in the Tampa Bay area while wearing a t-shirt with a Djibouti flag on it. Trend-setting, the Tampa Bay Breakfast way. That’s what sets us apart from those other guys.

Marek decided he would pay the bill. He took the money and the check and disappeared. I mean really disappeared. He got caught up in a crowd of baseball fans and swept away to the other part of the restaurant. I figured I’d just wait it out. He’s a highly trained and experienced Pancake Professional. He’ll find his way.

And he did. Five minutes later he comes back around and hands me the bill and the money. I don’t work here, junior! But we took care of the bill together. Breakfast for two, just under 14 Yen. Not cheap. Good chow and we didn’t feel ripped off, but we did agree that this was not a cost-effective breakfast.

On our way out the door we got jammed up by a crowd pushing in. So we looked at the postcard rack by the register. As our dedicated Tampa Bay Breakfast fans know well, Marek’s middle name is Inglis. Inglis happens to be where you would find Follow That Dream Parkway. Half a pancake point bump to Lenny’s for this nice little tie-in with home.

We left happy and full. Still arguing about the cross-over sport of baseball dune buggy racing, but at least breakfast was behind us!

Then we get to the car and Marek asks for an apple. So I gave the kid an apple.

We had a great time at Lenny’s. Great breakfast, though not very cheap, quality and endless coffee, danishes. Friendly people, full of regulars, and lots of unique flair. While we’re not “baseball people” we are breakfast people, and so is Lenny’s. We’re pleased to give Lenny’s a Tampa Bay Breakfast rating of four and a half pancakes.

Later that night we went and saw the Bolts win one. We haven’t heard the horn blow that many times all year! Marek spent the game hollering “Go Tampa!” while his mom was hollering “Fight, fight! Take the gloves off!” Crazy kids.

It’s a special double-header weekend! Marek and I had the day off so we went and had breakfast again. We went to The Gold Ring at 2510 N. Tampa Street. This was our first visit to The Gold Ring. They have a web site at http://goldringcafe.com/. I drive by The Gold Ring on the way to work every morning and it looked like a warm, homey, greasy spoon diner. It does not look like any picture you will find on their web site!

Inside is just a small little diner that seems to mostly cater to take-out. The menu is on the overhead and is pretty short and straightforward. Eggs. Toast. Hashbrowns. Grits. Bacon. Sandwiches. Coffee. Looks like some Cuban influence. Sort of Havana meets Down-South. The menu actually reminded me of the kind of truck-stop diner I used to favor when I was a lot younger and used to drive between Nashville and Inglis or Biloxi and Ocala all the time.

While I was looking at the menu, Marek grabbed a seat and pulled out some cars. He had two special cars, a “Race Car, dada” and a “it’s Green Car!” These two cars saw a lot of action both on and off the table-top.

We took a look around while we waited. Just a small diner, looks like it’s been here for at least three decades (the web site says they’ve been catering for 30 years, so there you go!).

We played more cars! There was a steady stream of customers, almost all of whom were getting take-out. While they waited they watched us. Most of the folks waiting started out sort of grim-looking. But after just a few minutes of watching Marek work his magic with race cars they warmed up. Marek got quite a few waves and hand-shakes by the time we were done!

Then breakfast came! You know how we feel about breakfast! Marek had pretty much all the bacon and a little toast. I had the eggs and hashbrowns and rest of the toast. It was a pretty filling meal, though the eggs were a little runnier than I personally care for. Marek chowed down on that bacon, though. He’s got a new passion.

Marek asked for orange juice. He got hooked up just right.

I had the large coffee. I had a choice of American or Cuban. I went with the Cuban and I was not disappointed. This was really delicious coffee. This alone is worth the stop. As you can see, even Marek liked it and he’s been off his coffee kick for months now. Some new-age diet of his, I think. You know how kids are these days, with their all-bacon/no-caffeine diets.

So here’s something interesting. The bill was $7.25, which I thought was pretty reasonable for a good-sized breakfast and a great coffee and a juice. I stuffed the two dollars in the tip jar at the counter and kept the three quarters. Whenever I get a pocket of change I always look for bicentennial quarters because I think they’re neat. So I look at these three quarters and notice that the dates on them are 1966, 1967, and 1980. They gave me three coins and one of them is 30 years old and the other two are over 40 years old. How odd is that?

When we were done we walked outside, after saying goodbye and adios to everyone. Marek had a new group of fans! We stopped to take a picture together because, honestly, we’d forgotten to take one inside!

The Gold Ring is really more of a take-out joint than a sit-in diner, which is sort of at the edge of the kind of breakfasts we tend to review (Especially since they don’t have pancakes!). The web site certainly counts as the “unique factor,” that and this corner is the only place in Tampa where I have ever actually heard gunfire. The price is reasonable and the place is full of regulars who don’t start out overly friendly but still end up that way. The food is pretty good, but the coffee is really excellent. We give The Gold Ring a Tampa Bay Breakfasts three-pancake rating.

We revisited Pop-n-Sons diner on 30 January 2010. Our first visit was back in May 2009. We had a fine time then, and we had a fine time today. As you can see from the sign, they have a special on scrapple. Grandpaw will be interested to know that!

Check out the neat mural of a drive-in out on the front porch.

This Tampa Bay Breakfast was a real treat. We had our favorite guest reviewer, Mom!

Here’s a nice touch. We sit down and automatically they bring us crayons.

This never happens to me when I’m alone, so I’m taking advantage of the crayons! Also, check out my kickin’ LISA09 shirt! Am I a nerd or what? Don’t make fun of me, Hugh, you’ve got the same shirt.

Marek says, hey old man, you’re always making me give you a kiss. How ’bout un beso for me?

Here’s a nice menu. Not the most comprehensive menu in town, but all the basics are here. And the prices are reasonable, too.

We had some coffee. This pitch-black swill was like having a cup of used battery acid mixed with old Mac truck motor oil. By which I mean it was perfect. This is some great diner coffee!

Even Mom got into the act. Though she doesn’t appreciate the concept of “diner coffee” so she tried the hot chocolate instead. She’s so cute.

Watch out! Here comes breakfast! This is a fine spread. We jumped into having three pancakes because we remembered them being a bit small on our last visit. Like that Grabby McGrab paw coming in from the left? There was an actual “yoink” sound.

Marek didn’t seem to care for the pancakes, but he surely loved that bacon!

Our guest reviewer said that the French toast was the best she’s had all day. She’s “in a family way,” which pretty much means that anything she eats has to taste good both going down AND coming back up. We’ll see what happens.

Marek wondered if I had something special going on over here. Of course I did — I had breakfast! Marek had best watch out, he’s coming in through the Breakfast Spider entrance.

Marek declined to pay the bill today. Something about how he was having a bout of sympathetic morning sickness. But the bill for two-and-a-half was a shade over 17 bucks. A little pricey, maybe, but not the most expensive we’ve seen.

On the way out the door, we got into a philosophical discussion about pops with nice lady. Is there truly anything finer than to see a bowl of pops like this?

By the time we got home, the pops had done the trick. Check out that tongue!

We had a very nice re-visit to Pop-n-Sons Diner. The breakfast is good eating, the prices are OK, and the people are super-nice from start to finish. The 50s diner motif is always fun. And breakfast with Mom is always a winner! Thanks, Mom, for joining us!

We’re pleased to re-affirm this Tampa Bay Breakfast’s four-pancake rating!

Our plan this morning was to go to Aunti Donna’s on South Macdill Ave. Aunti Donna’s appears to be closed. Breakfast is cut-throat business in Tampa, folks!

We visited The Brunchery at 3225 S. MacDill Avenue on 9 January 2010. This was our first Tampa Bay Breakfast of the year and our first visit to The Brunchery. They also have a web site at http://www.brunchery.com/.

Inside is very nice. I know the low-lighting is deliberate, but it plays havoc with my little phone camera. And it made it feel like Marek and I were on a date. Very romantic. The neatest thing about the interior is this long bench along the wall. Very communal feeling! Marek insisted that he sit on that side and I sit in the chair across from him so we could play cars.

The menu is pretty extensive. Prices seem pretty reasonable. There’s a lot of discussion in this menu about the craft of breakfast, with special this and hand-made that. Of course, we eat that stuff up. Get it? We “eat it up!” Hawahhahawhwhaw!

I slay me.

They brought us crayons. We love crayons. Now, of course, they ended up in the coffee after a few minutes, but hey, everything has its place. Marek also puts pepper on his pancakes, but we’re not discussing that today.

While we were waiting, we got some all-important father-son affection. I’ve got to draw notice to my hilarious shirt. There’s no humor like Bourne Shell Humor.

We had coffee, too. You know how much we love coffee. And Thomas the Train, by the way, but that’s another story. The coffee at The Brunchery came in two flavors: Normal and frou frou. We chose normal, because we’re manly men and we like drinking battery acid. We found this coffee to have a nice taste, but, in all honesty, it seemed a little weak. Maybe we’re just numb from all the high-octane truck stop go-juice over the years, but I definitely like my coffee stronger.

Then breakfast came! We love breakfast! Now our fine waitress did warn us that the “two, two, and two” breakfast pancakes were small and that the “normal” pancakes were, well, normal. So we go the triple-two route plus a single blueberry pancake. That blueberry pancake was rockin’ like Elvis, let me tell you. But a 2-pence coin in England is larger than these two pancakes Marek had. These were mere dollops of pancake. We were warned, but wow, that warning was on-target!

Marek didn’t mind, and dove right in. Our waitress asked us if everything was OK. I asked Marek if it was delicious. He shook his head “no.” I asked him if it was “only good.” He nodded his head “yes.” Lad knows the difference. That’s pretty neat.

Marek ate both those little pancakes, which probably add up to a whole pancake elsewhere. All in all he ate pretty well. Wash it all down with a good belt of juice.

When we were all done, Marek did not want to pay the bill. Instead, he hopped like a frog for a while. I declined to join him, though I know he would have loved it if we all had.

We had a pretty nice time at The Brunchery. The food was tasty and the bill was only ten dollars, but the coffee was a little weak and the pancakes were small. It’s also cold as the dickens out today, so maybe our taste buds are off today. This was a fine breakfast, all things considered. We’re pleased to give The Brunchery a three and a half pancake rating.