Our plan this morning was to go to Aunti Donna’s on South Macdill Ave. Aunti Donna’s appears to be closed. Breakfast is cut-throat business in Tampa, folks!

We visited The Brunchery at 3225 S. MacDill Avenue on 9 January 2010. This was our first Tampa Bay Breakfast of the year and our first visit to The Brunchery. They also have a web site at http://www.brunchery.com/.

Inside is very nice. I know the low-lighting is deliberate, but it plays havoc with my little phone camera. And it made it feel like Marek and I were on a date. Very romantic. The neatest thing about the interior is this long bench along the wall. Very communal feeling! Marek insisted that he sit on that side and I sit in the chair across from him so we could play cars.

The menu is pretty extensive. Prices seem pretty reasonable. There’s a lot of discussion in this menu about the craft of breakfast, with special this and hand-made that. Of course, we eat that stuff up. Get it? We “eat it up!” Hawahhahawhwhaw!

I slay me.

They brought us crayons. We love crayons. Now, of course, they ended up in the coffee after a few minutes, but hey, everything has its place. Marek also puts pepper on his pancakes, but we’re not discussing that today.

While we were waiting, we got some all-important father-son affection. I’ve got to draw notice to my hilarious shirt. There’s no humor like Bourne Shell Humor.

We had coffee, too. You know how much we love coffee. And Thomas the Train, by the way, but that’s another story. The coffee at The Brunchery came in two flavors: Normal and frou frou. We chose normal, because we’re manly men and we like drinking battery acid. We found this coffee to have a nice taste, but, in all honesty, it seemed a little weak. Maybe we’re just numb from all the high-octane truck stop go-juice over the years, but I definitely like my coffee stronger.

Then breakfast came! We love breakfast! Now our fine waitress did warn us that the “two, two, and two” breakfast pancakes were small and that the “normal” pancakes were, well, normal. So we go the triple-two route plus a single blueberry pancake. That blueberry pancake was rockin’ like Elvis, let me tell you. But a 2-pence coin in England is larger than these two pancakes Marek had. These were mere dollops of pancake. We were warned, but wow, that warning was on-target!

Marek didn’t mind, and dove right in. Our waitress asked us if everything was OK. I asked Marek if it was delicious. He shook his head “no.” I asked him if it was “only good.” He nodded his head “yes.” Lad knows the difference. That’s pretty neat.

Marek ate both those little pancakes, which probably add up to a whole pancake elsewhere. All in all he ate pretty well. Wash it all down with a good belt of juice.

When we were all done, Marek did not want to pay the bill. Instead, he hopped like a frog for a while. I declined to join him, though I know he would have loved it if we all had.

We had a pretty nice time at The Brunchery. The food was tasty and the bill was only ten dollars, but the coffee was a little weak and the pancakes were small. It’s also cold as the dickens out today, so maybe our taste buds are off today. This was a fine breakfast, all things considered. We’re pleased to give The Brunchery a three and a half pancake rating.

We re-visited J. Christopher’s on 27 December 2009.

Marek and I were sleeping, and sleeping well. When Mom says, “We’re going to J. Christopher’s! You call yourselves Pancake Professionals?! GET UP GET UP! Let’s go get pancakes! Time’s a-wastin! How can you sleep at a time like this? I’m Hongreeeeeeee……”

To which I replied, Duffman said he would do whatever you wanted! Please stop kicking and punching Duffman!

(Mom’s “in a family way.” She can drag us out of bed for breakfast as much as she likes!)

Inside is expansive and stylish. They can sling a lotta pancakes in this joint.

We had an exceptionally immense breakfast. The kind that should come with a cigar, a martini, and a million dollar business deal.

This is an impressive spread. The kind you almost wish you dressed up for. It’s definitely good enough to share with friends!

When we were done, Marek paid the bill.

Our waitress was a very nice girl named Liza. You don’t meet a Liza every day! Well, unless you work at J. Christopher’s with her, I guess. Marek chased her down to give her a fist full of dollars!

So at the end of the day, there’s only two things I don’t care for at J. Christopher’s. The first is that it’s such a nice place — not a hint of grease anywhere. Bill, the proprietor, has told us that they are, in fact, NOT a chain, but they still have a high degree of polish. You would expect an executive chef in the back, and not a phalanx of authentic grannies (*) plying ancient hand-woven recipes.

The second is the bill. J. Christopher’s is Not Cheap for breakfast. I’m NOT saying that it’s not worth it, because the food is simply fabulous and the people are wonderful, but save your pennies when you go!

All that said, it’s just great food. Bill, I told you last time that we were docking you a half a point for being a chain. Since you’re not a chain after all, we’ll make good on it and grant the bump. Those blueberry crunch pancakes are awesome. We’re pleased to give J. Christopher’s a Tampa Bay Breakfasts four and a half pancake rating.

(*) I just verified, there is no other usage of the phrase “phalanx of authentic grannies” on the Internet. Just ask Google. Innovation every day, here at Tampa Bay Breakfasts.

It’s a gosh-darned beautiful fall day in Florida. We’re going to celebrate these clear blue skies with … Breakfast! (For our fans in England, Canada, Europe, and the Northern United States, yes, we ARE rubbing it in! (For our fans in Tampa who think I’m making it up, we really DO have fans in England, Canada, Europe, and up north!))

We visited Daily Eats at 901 S Howard Ave on 27 November 2009. Daily Eats has a website at http://www.dailyeatstampa.com/. This was our first successful visit to Daily Eats; we tried to come hear earlier in the year but we were there before they opened. Marek is sleeping later these days so we get a chance to try new places that open after 0800.

Already we like this joint. The name “Daily Eats” is so basic, common-man, fundamental, people-oriented. It’s a simple diner inside, with a great lunch counter. Marek wants to sit here, but he couldn’t really reach yet. Next year, little buddy!

The menu is pretty extensive, though I didn’t see the word “bacon” anywhere (our chipper waitress assured me we could get bacon if we wanted it). The very first thing I DID see is “blueberry pancakes!”

The second thing I see is booze for breakfast. We noticed a table of girls and mimosas as we walked in, which set the scene for good times this fine Florida morning. Marek wanted the Bloody Mary, but he had to settle for his juice box. Bummer.

Daily Eats is in the middle of the SOHO district of Tampa. There’s a lot of stylish, fancy folk in this part of town. Marek says, hey big-daddy, I’m a movie star. All the ladies love me. Talk to my agent. Dad.

We had coffee. This was good swill. And when we left, we got a complimentary to-go cup of black beauty. We love coffee.

While we waited for pancakes, we got into a discussion about Marek’s current favorite topic, dinosaurs. He really liked talking about dinosaurs and gave big kisses. I said “Triceratops.” Marek said “Soarasaurus.” I pointed out that there was no such thing and he must have made that up. He called me a non-paleontology-knowing dumb-dumb. I told him to look it up. He pulled a knife and stabbed me in the head. Just an average day.

Thankfully, breakfast arrived before there was any sort of significant bloodletting. Look at this bodacious haul. Those pancakes must weigh a pound each.

The eggs were perfect, exactly as I like them. The potatoes that came with the pancakes were quite yummy. The pancakes were good but really heavy. Neither Marek nor I were able to finish ours. I won’t disparage these pancakes, but I do personally prefer a lighter blueberry pancake experience.

Marek liked the pancakes. But he liked them better with pepper. What? Don’t look at ME, I’m not putting pepper on MY pancakes. Ick.

When we were done, Marek paid the bill. He likes earning his keep.

He found his way and even made friends. I was too far away to hear, but it looks to me like he’s getting this girl’s phone number. “Hey baby, I may be two years old and live with my parents, but I’ve got my own breakfast money and I can count to ten in Spanish.” Probably makes him a pretty viable dating candidate compared to a 35 year old who lives with his parents and doesn’t have his own breakfast money.

We went outside and played in traffic. Got to work off those heavy pancakes!

We had a very nice time at Daily Eats. Folks were friendly. The chow was good. The price was nice (eleven bones for a meal the two of us couldn’t finish). And most importantly, we had fun. Well fun and a knife fight, but who’s keeping score? We’re pleased to give Daily Eats a Tampa Bay Breakfast rating of four pancakes.

So we get up this morning and Marek announces that it’s going to rain pancakes. I say sure kid, it rains pancakes every weekend. That’s what we’re here for, to serve the people of the Tampa Bay area by exercising our exceptional breakfast powers. He says, no dad, it’s really going to rain pancakes. I’m bringing an umbrella. There’s no arguing with this kid.

We visited the Garden Grill at 8425 W Hillsborough Ave on 24 October 2009. This was our first visit to the Garden Grill. It’s on the way to the Oldsmar Flea Market, which is, if the sign may be believed, the mightiest in the south. That’s our favorite flea market. The Garden Grill sign says that they’re the best kept secret in town. And they promise. That’s a good sign. That’s also a good double entendre.

We got inside and found a pretty nice little place. Lunch counter. Check. Friendly folks. Check. Sit anywhere you like. Check. Booth in the back. Check.

We got right into some high octane. That’s a good brew. Tastes like Columbian battery acid (that’s a compliment, by the way). Sometimes a little slow in coming, but it hit the spot like a twelve volt jolt to the nervy system. I’m not going to disparage this coffee.

We were cute when we sat down. We were not crazy.

We promptly got out of hand, like a couple of sailors on a bender after six months of sea duty with no port calls. We got crazy.

What about breakfast? The menu was extensive. Three pages of breakfast bliss. And. AND. And they were able to do blueberry pancakes. Marek had the Micky pancake.

I had the “two two two.” Our waitress was very sweet. We kept asking her to repeat it. “Two two two.” We just liked hearing her say it, and we talked about Thomas the Train after she left. “What does Thomas say?” “Two two two!”

Two Two Two, Thomas!

The eggs were OK, but not nearly what you’d find at Samaria Cafe. The bacon was OK, but not Steve Standard. I was surprised that Marek had some. He hasn’t touched bacon since he started reading up on Middle Eastern history a few months back. The pancakes were interesting. They were good, and I showed them who’s boss in a vigorous, take-no-pancakes-prisoner sort of way. But they had an odd taste, like the blueberries were fresh but a little out of season or there was an extra ingredient in the batter. Hard to put the finger on it. Not a bad thing, just something I noticed while I was concentrating on making pancakes disappear with my mind. Oh, and also by eating them.

I says, hey Marek Madness, give yer ole man a kiss. The Madness replies, not in a million years, pops, because a Hooters girl might walk in any moment and see me and I don’t want you cootying me up like that.

Then a nice lady come by to talk about her fruit cups. If we weren’t there for pancakes, we’d have had fruit! It looked delicious!

After the nice fruit lady left, we had a bit of an altercation about shoes. I was “pro-shoes” and “anti-feet-on-table” and Marek, dear Marek, was a member of the opposition party. And he supports raising taxes to increase funding for public schools. It’s always politics with this kid.

That’s when we realized that there were spiders in the booth with us. Holy Moley! Luckily, these were common Breakfast Spiders. We see them every weekend. I think they follow us in.

We finished up and paid the bill. Marek was in a hurry to get home in time for Leave it to Beaver!

Our breakfast turned out to be about $14, which is a little high but not bad for what we had. The people were all exceptionally nice, especially the fresh fruit lady. The chow was good and we certainly didn’t go away hungry. We just had a nice, low-key time at the Garden Grill and would cheerfully recommend it to breakfasteers anywhere.

We’re pleased to give the Garden Grill a Tampa Bay Breakfasts rating of three and a half stars.